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Writer's pictureScott Murray

The Unexpected Netflix Story With Lessons About Humanized Company Culture

Mats's family learns about his online life

The Value of this Insight: I like to add insights into company culture because internal communication and humanization impact external communication and humanization (content marketing and customer service).


My wife and I watched a new Netflix documentary about a family who lost their son at the age of 25 to a degenerative muscular disease, only to discover a life they never knew he had.


How did they learn about this second life?


He left them a password that led to a journal and a community of friends from the World of Warcraft.


When they told that community that Mats Steen (or Ibelin - his character name) had died, they inundated his parents with emotional reactions and stories about the impact he had on them.


In The Remarkable Life of Ibelin, we meet Mats, who struggles with balance from an early age due to Duchenne muscular dystrophy. 


Over time, the disease confined him to a wheelchair, as his ability to move, eat, and interact with others gradually declined.


It was obviously devastating, and his death left his parents painfully dwelling on everything he didn't have and couldn't experience, like:


  • Friendships

  • Love 

  • Making a difference in people's lives


Once they took a deeper look into that part of his life, everything changed. 

As his father said during Mats's eulogy:


"You proved us wrong. You proved us so wrong.”



While this documentary tells amazing humanized stories, it also offers lessons about communication, assumptions and empathy. 


These lessons can benefit business cultures and help them develop external content and communications that similarly resonate with people.


For example, we hear about storytelling in the external world, but important stories take place within a company's culture.


The Stories That Define a Company Culture

At first, World of Warcraft seemed like another game where Mats could play a hero in a magical world. However, it became so much more once his parents heard the stories from his circle of online friends.


These stories defined what was really happening in the game.


It was more than a digital program that helped Mats pass the time.

It was a world where:


  • He could live (as Ibelin) in a place where he could live without being judged.

  • He could connect with others in ways his day-to-day life didn’t allow. 


But while Mats spent thousands of hours in that world, his parents didn’t know just how much was happening there.


They didn't know the stories of friendships, romances, and meaningful conversations.


Mats as Ibelin in World of Warcraft

Some of these conversations with Mats changed and impacted real people's lives.


The Power of Empathy 

One way Mats impacted other people inside World of Warcraft was by taking an interest in others' lives.


His friends said it meant a lot to them. It was everything.


Sometimes it was Mats doing simple things like:


  • Remembering an event in their lives and asking how it went.

  • Asking, "How are you doing?"

  • Listening to their worries and concerns from real life.


His friends were now sharing stories with Mats's parents about how his empathy and advice improved their lives.


On the business side, I think about the times I watched Undercover Boss and all the times when a leader's perspective would dramatically change just by learning more about their employees.


The Need for Two-Way Communication

While there was so much that was better for Mats in the game, it too had its share of challenges - especially when communication channels weren't two-way. 


His real-life depression and frustrations would sometimes cause him to react harshly to people, and it was harder for his friends in the world to understand because they assumed he was a "normal" person. 


Ibelin talks with his friends

One of his close friends said it was tough because they had opened up to him about deeply personal things, and he was so closed off.


Finally, Mats opened up. But it was almost as if he needed proof that it wouldn't change how people saw him.


Plus, while it was easier to understand why Mats wasn't always transparent after learning more about his condition, Mats had to learn how to open up to others the way they opened up to him.


There are similar reasons why people don't speak up, share or express themselves at work. One reason is that the culture doesn't embody a two-way communication environment. In cases like that, people will fear expressing or sharing things.


What Companies Can Learn From Mats's Community

Mats's story offers many important lessons about empathy, assumptions and communication that anyone can learn. But at a time when mental health issues, "quietly quitting," Broken Culture Syndrome and other humanistic challenges are plaguing company cultures, there are lessons for the business world as well.


Know the Stories That Make Up Your Company Culture

Eric Ratinoff is the Founder and Chief Storyteller of the strategic storytelling firm Story First.


He says company cultures are made up of grand narratives and daily stories



The grand narrative may be inspiring, but it’s the daily stories—the lived experiences of employees—that truly define how people behave and what’s valued within an organization. 


Culture thrives when these stories align with the grand narrative; dysfunction and disengagement take root when they don't.


What do you know about the people in your company culture?


Do you know their stories—their lives outside of work? Do you ask?


Viewing World of Warcraft as “just a game” overlooked the deep friendships and meaningful connections Mats created.


Similarly, leadership can often rely on a "just what it is" mindset about company culture. Or the definition of a culture may only be surface-level.


Organizational culture expert Edgar Schein explains that company culture goes much deeper than what you see on the surface—policies, perks, or slogans like "we're innovative."


These are just artifacts—the visible elements of culture.


Even if everyone knows what kind of culture the company claims to have, it has to have a deeper meaning.


For example: "We're an innovative culture."


  • What does that mean to anyone?

  • Does anyone under leadership believe that?

  • Do employees have stories that support that culture, and does it matter to them?

  • And, more importantly, does leadership know their stories?


I once worked at a company that described itself as a Good to Great culture.

That was only surface level.


📕 The CEO told everyone to read the book and act accordingly.


That's what defined the label.


Yet, some stories didn't align with the label.


  • Some people didn't read the book.

  • There were internal discussions about the company having "the wrong people on the bus."

  • There needed to be follow-up, training or further attempt to define what that meant.

  • The CEO could have been more approachable and receptive to feedback like Good to Great recommends.


Everyone knew the "Good to Great" culture label, but it didn't mean anything.

In his Ted Talk, Eric Ratinoff shares a fantastic story about a Southwest Airlines employee named Darlene Taylor that reflects their company's grand narrative.


She retrieved a customer’s luggage from a plane during a snowstorm. 


These stories inspire action, build connections, and reinforce the culture. When leaders listen to and share these stories, they create a culture where employees feel valued and engaged, driving the organization’s success.


Embrace Empathy and Communication

Mats felt very insecure about sharing much, until his community proved it wouldn't change their feelings about him.


Within a company culture, people shouldn't fear to speak up, whether to share an idea, contribute to a meeting, or express their feelings.


One of the best books on company culture and communication, Crucial Conversations, says that individuals are more likely to share their honest opinions when they feel secure.


This openness leads to better decision-making and stronger relationships within the organization. So, leaders are advised to:


  • Actively listen

  • Validate diverse perspectives

  • Approach discussions with empathy 


One of Mats' key impacts on others was his willingness to ask simple questions.

“How are you doing?” or “How did that go?”


In a work culture, a "practical empathy conversation" could start with:


  • How are you doing?

  • I believe you’re giving all you can right now. But help me understand what’s in your way.

  • How can we remove barriers to your success?

  • How can we help you show up and contribute in a way that’s fulfilling for you?”


Then, listen to the other person.


Overcoming Assumptions By Knowing the Stories

It's easy to make assumptions in a company culture. Assumptions are made about people, their motivations, their descriptions of life at work, and their feelings about their jobs.


Office Space Bobs

Mats’s friends made assumptions. 


They assumed he was like them—someone with no major challenges beyond those of a typical gamer. 


But when Mats opened up about his real-life struggles, it completely changed their understanding of his behavior and their relationships.


In the same way that Mats’ parents learned the deeper story of his life through his friends, leaders need to look beyond surface-level assumptions to understand what’s really shaping their culture.


Listen, Learn, and Lead

I highly recommend watching The Remarkable Life of Ibelin on Netflix.


It started with two loving parents who thought their son's story was about what he missed in life, but the real story was so much more.


Don’t let too many days pass without truly connecting with the people in your company culture. 


Take the time to talk, learn, and understand their stories. 


If your culture excels at that, it will be filled with people who know how to infuse storytelling, human empathy and meaningful connections into external communications and marketing.


By helping, supporting, and investing in those around you, you create a culture that’s more than just surface-level—it becomes a place where everyone can thrive, grow, and make a meaningful impact.


This also appeared in my LinkedIn Newsletter, Humanized Content Insights.

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